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We’ve already touched on vibrating prostate massagers, but — spoiler alert — not all prostate massagers vibrate. Some are basically just butt plugs with a special shape (aka increased curve) to support prostate stimulation. Below they explain what these sex toys do and how to know if one deserves a place in your drawer.

And boy oh boy are there a lot of different types of external vibes. "Whether you’re thrusting into someone else, into your own hand, or just wearing it around, you don’t want the Realistic Dildo to be wiggling around," she explains. A prostate massager is a vibrating toy that goes up the anus to stimulate the prostate. "This can be thought of as the male equivalent to G-spot stimulators," Fleming says.

While double-ended dildos are typically U- or I-shaped, strapless strap on-ons are L-shaped. Usually 12 to 24 inches long, some look like two dildos fused together (like the Lovehoney Ice Gem) and others are U-shaped (like the Ruse double dildo). There’s also a variety of textured details you might experiment with once you’ve confirmed that you enjoy dildo play or penetration. She adds that a standard dildo can be used by hand or worn in a harness to stimulate these spots. Crops tend to deliver a more piercing/stinging sensation, whereas paddles are often referred to as "thuddy." Floggers can be either, depending on the shape and brand.

We recommend water-based lube because it is safe to use with all types of toys. Generally you don’t need to disinfect toys that only one person uses or that stay covered with condoms. Some nonporous, nonmotorized toys can go into the dishwasher without soap for steam sanitizing.

Bianca was formerly managing editor of a Kinsey Institute blog and has presented academic research on transgender-youth health advocacy and menstrual biohacking. She/they are passionate about normalizing healthy discussions of sexuality in everyday life. In an earlier version of this guide, we named the CalExotics Silver Bullet as our budget pick. Subsequently we concluded that the pricier but cordless Satisfyer Purple Pleasure offered stronger vibrations, was made of better-quality materials, and was more aesthetically pleasing.

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